3 Secrets of Good Communication with Your Child

Listen, Ask, Share

In my last post, I emphasized the importance of good communication with your child.  Now I wish to share with you 3 secrets of how to have that good communication.

Here is a very important piece of advice if you wish to improve your communications with your child: listen actively. That means listen to their feelings. Often the content of what is being said is not as important as the feelings. So watch out about jumping in to “fix” the situation – something men are prone to do –and listen to the feelings of the child.

The second principle is ASK. Be interested in their world. Ask them about it – find out about their friends, their interests, their dreams, their fears,

And if you really want to ask some powerful questions, ask each child about how you are doing as a dad. First, “what do you like about the way I treat you?” And if you are really brave, ask “What don’t you like about the way I treat you?”

Ask these two questions and you are likely to find out some surprising things that will help you be a better dad. And ask them whether your kids are 3 years old or 33 – or anywhere in between.

The third principle of good communication is “share”. That’s a big one that we will look into next month.



The Importance of Good Communication with Your Child

The 5 Principles of Good Communication

Good communication with your child is very important. It promotes healthy self-esteem and good character building in your child. It profoundly affects a child’s ability to relate to and love others.

There is both good news and bad news regarding father-child communication. The good news is that surveys show that teens DO want to talk to their parents.

The bad news is found in a survey by Josh McDowell of 3,700 teens in evangelical churches:

  • 1 in 4 said they have never had a meaningful conversation with their father
  • 54% say they seldom or never talk with their father about their personal concerns

Want better communication with your child? Follow these five principles of good communication:

  • if it is not working, change it
  • let kids know you care
  • see life through your kids’ eyes
  • it takes time
  • look for the good times

Why not take some practical training in good communication in our Basic #3 video on this website.  The lifelong payoff between you and your child will be tremendous.