Disciplining Your Child – A Whole New Perspective Part 2

Pay Attention to Child's Good Behavior

We are in the middle of looking at four offensive strategies to discipline our children constructively. Last post, we looked at the first of these: modeling good behavior.

The second is to pay attention to your child’s good behavior.

This strategy is basic, but too often neglected. As dad, pay attention to, acknowledge, and affirm your child’s good behavior.

All children, of any age, want attention. They so crave it that much misbehavior results from seeking parents’ attention. Given these basic facts, it stands to reason that we can minimize the misbehavior by paying attention to, thereby reinforcing, the good behavior.

As dads, we give kids our attention by noticing and praising their good behavior. So they practice further good behavior to get more of our attention. Pretty soon, in a positive self-reinforcing cycle of father-child behavior, a relationship develops in which children have the confidence and the desire to do what is right.

Children will perform in the way that pays off. Encourage the good behavior by providing a big payoff for it.

In the next post, we will look at establishing fair rules and boundaries.

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